November 2008
Nov 19, 2008 4:12:51 GMT -5
Post by OrochiGeese on Nov 19, 2008 4:12:51 GMT -5
UBL Open show - November 2008.
*The Battle Chamber comes alive with the sound of "Fanfare" signaling an early ratings victory for the show!
"Party has gained 5 Nielson points!*
*Enemy has stolen one flask*
*GET YE FLASK*
Seriously though, I just had to get that out of my system. It's time we turn snarky commentary over for good to real time announcer happenings and so it's my pleasure to introduce the new(day for WC...) host for the show - Who? The man formerly known as NDP Furis-handler John comes through the curtain and walks onto the ramp with a microphone. He waves to the fans and then sits down at a nearby table.*
[John:] "Hello and welcome to the UBL Open for November 2008. If I can indulge myself in a brief intro, my name is John Randolph and you may recognize me as one of the interviewers from New Damage Pro Wrestling. Well, my work was noticed by the good Sergeant Drake Yoshida during an interview with a certain creature from the night and Mr. Yoshida liked my insults so much that he offered me this position as the new host of the Open shows. I can only hope to follow the great job Jean Carter has done in the past."
[John:] "Tonight we feature the second round of action in the Nexus Title Tournament in addition to two other exciting matches. Let's have a look up on the BattleTron as to what tonight holds in store for us.
*The BattleTron displays six matches*
1? - (T) Kyle Walker vs. Gene Starr
2 - NiSan-Dan vs. The Dudes
Debut of Caesaro's Palace with special guest: Jakob Furis
3 - (T) Jang Bae vs. Elvis Archibal
Intermission
4 - (T) DF Allen vs. Johnny Brooke
5 - Hank Panky Trial Series: Hank Panky vs. Park Hyun Soo
6 - (T) Juan Leche vs. Karl Wunderlin
[John:] "Let's get right to our first match of tonight. After some controversy at the end of the previous Open show, Kyle Walker was declared the winner of his first round Nexus Tournament match against Bak Fu. However, Kyle has still not confirmed whether or not he actually wants to wrestle tonight or if he intends to give Gene Starr a bye. A pity, really, but Kyle believes that since he did not win his match fairly against Bak, that he doesn't deserve to advance in this tournament. Or at least, he believed that at the end of the previous show. Perhaps OrochiGeese has helped him to change his mind over the last few months. I suppose the time for speculation is over as Kyle is going to give his answer right now. If he agrees to the match, then Gene Starr will face him right after. And here comes Kyle to the ring."
Kyle Walker's decision
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[John:] "And Kyle has just suffered a vicious and heinous attack at the hands of Nicole Dramesi! The medics have rushed onto the scene in addition to OrochiGeese and Drake Yoshida. I can only suppose Holly is backstage under close protection by Genji Security. It appeared as if Gene Starr was going to come out to hear Kyle's challenge first hand but Nicole blindsided Kyle before Gene's music could even start. This will definitely create some disorder on the show but most importantly, how hurt is Kyle Walker?"
*Drake Yoshida quickly walks over to John and whispers to him as the medics are putting Kyle on a stretcher and slowly carrying him backstage. OrochIGeese isn't even acknowledging the audience and instead appears to be lost in a combination of thought and rage.*
[John:] "Ok, I just got word from the Sergeant that we are going to go right to the next match for the night - Jang Bae vs. Elvis Archibal. I'll try to update you all on Kyle's condition as the night continues. I'm sure we haven't heard the last of this, what with Kyle being the protege of the boss, Orochi Geese."
[John:] "As for now, our next match should be plenty interestng in of itself. Jang Bae is getting a rematch against Elvis Archibal with a lot more on the line this time then their previous match: a match where Elvis managed to knock Jang Bae out with his "Shake, Rattle, and Roll" crucifix powerbomb finisher. Jang has acknowledged that as his toughest loss so far in professional wrestling and he swears to have learned from it thanks to the help of Thunder Strike. However, Jang has also been very involved in the Universal Battalion league and there is a question as to his fatigue level from that, not to mention the grueling, bloody match he had with Elader to make it to this round. Elvis is coming off a very decisive victory against Crimson Tide and a strong year here in UBL. Will Jang be able to avenge his loss in this condition or will Elvis continue his undefeated streak and advance to the semi-finals of this tournament? Jean Carter told me that you all love rhetorical questions so I hope you just got your money's worth, folks. Let's get to the match."
Match #1: Jang Bae vs. Elvis Archibal
Nexus Championship Tournament Round 2
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[John:] "Wow, what a hard fought match that was! As the 10 minute mark approached, both men were neck and neck and Elvis decided to bust out his "Shake, Rattle, and Roll" finisher that knocked out Jang last time! The crowd held their breath but Jang not only kept his consciousness, he actually kicked out of the manuever! And then, Elvis managed to kick out of Jang's "Running w/ Scissors!" It came down to Jang using a new manuever, a Shining Triangle, to get Elvis to tap out after working on his arm throughout the match. This series is now tied but Jang won the right to advance in this Nexus Title Tournament!"
Jang Bae (O) [Shining Triangle - 13:12] (X) Elvis Archibal
[John:] "Ok and now it's time to get to a match between two teams hoping to get UBL contracts. This match also stems from the Trial by Fire 2 match where Dude Thunder outlasted Dambman. It seems that Damb's NiSan-Dan group wants a chance for retribution against the Dudes group, which will be represented by Dude Fire and Dude Death tonight. Sergeant Yoshida was impressed by both Damb and Dude's performances, despite falling short in the Trial match, and gave them contracts. If these two teams can also win over Drake, then they can also add their names to the roster. The question is will any personal animosity get in the way of them showing their best, or conversely, will Drake reward them for intensity against their rivals. Only time and Drake's next missive will tell."
Match #2: NiSan-Dn vs. the Dudes
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[John:] "You gotta hand it to both teams here, they really brought their passion! NiSan-Dan won the match by making use of tag team and outside tactics along with that huge Rolling Fireman's Carry from Jae Viral. But the Dudes took the fight to the NiSan-Dan throughout the entire match! I won't be surprised to see both groups accepted and put in another match in the future."
KMD/Jae Viral (O) [Rolling Fireman Carry - 18:21] (X) Dude Fire/Dude Death
[John:] "And now we come to the part of the night where I will take a perverse glee in watching someone ELSE attempt to interview the verbal virus that is "Count" Jakob Furis. I do not know this Julian Caesaro and I certainly have no ill will towards him but my friend, you really just opened up the path to a nightmarish existence by inviting this vampire into your Royale home. You'll see...it starts with an interview and it ends with him calling you at 4 in the morning asking you to bring over sardines. So I'm just going to sit back and hope he takes enough of a liking to you to leave ME alone."
Caesaro's Palace
*Kanye West's "Flashing Lights" come on...and we see the Royale One, Julian Caesaro! For the fans that know him, cheers for him and for those that don't, boos, because he looks arrogant. Ceese is decked out in a a black suit with the words "Royale" written on the back in diamonds (Ode to Mr. Perfect). He steps in the ring and looks at the UBL logo. He stands in the middle of the ring and goes into a GQ pose. He pulls out his own personal mic that is gold and has the words "King Royale" on the side of it. He signals for the music to be cut off and is met with a mixed reaction*
[Ceese:] What It do Playas and Playettes! Welcome to the debut of Caesaro's Palace on UBL! I am your host with the most, the kid that loves to boast, and have ladies screaming from coast to coast, Julian Caesaro!... Now this is new territory for the Royale One! Hopefully, this territory will be King Royale's new land. The Royale Age is coming and there is no one that can stop that. *The crowd starts to boo* Now for my 1st guest....*Ceese looks at the card in disbelief* Are you serious? Great....My 1st guest needs no introduction...because im not going to give it to him....Here is Jakob Furis!
*Furis music starts to play and he comes out menacingly....but the crowd is not buying it. Perhaps because John is rolling his eyes or perhaps because Furis has toilet paper on his shoes. Either way, he attempts to make his way down the ramp. He runs up on a 6 year old kid and tries to scare him...but the kid threw his drink at him...After that, he runs down to the ring, trips on his cape, and falls flat on his face...The crowd is laughing hard. Ceese has a "WTF" look on his face. Finally, Furis gets in the ring. He tries to scare Ceese but Ceese has a look like he is about to start cracking up. Furis finally sits down and the pain begins.*
[Ceese:] *trying to hold his laughter in* "W--W---Welcome to the Palace, Furis
[Furis:] Vit's a pleasure to be here, Veese
[Ceese:] Its Ceese.
[Furis:] Thats what I said...Veese
[Ceese:] Its Ceese!
[Furis:] Vhats Vrong vit vu? I said Veese!
*Ceese is looking at Furis like he wants to superkick him*
[Ceese:] Lets start the show, please? my 1st question is how did you get your start in UBL?
[Furis:] "I started first in NDP and impressed the vorld of vestling so much that UBL invited me! Some say that OrochiGeese himself vas in such awe of my abilities that he vanted to vecruit me for his Orochi Army!! However, I am no footsoldier, I am the leader of the Army of Evil! And so Geese must bow down to ME!"
[Ceese:] Yeah...OG is scared of you *Rolls his eyes*. Anyway, I heard about your losing streak in NDP? Care to comment on that?
[Furis:] "Vhere did you hear such lies!? I am the most dominant vestler in NDP history! Who here has not vatched the losing streak of Evan Divine ever since I taught him a lesson!? Ve have heard no vords from him either! But me, everyone hears from me more then they vould ever vant to!!"
[Ceese:] Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigggggghhhhhttt....My last question is.... I know this is a long shot...But when will we see Furis with a title around his waist?
[Furis:] "Gold is not the color of vhat I seek. Only RED is! For red is the color of blood!! But I vealize that to be considered by everyone as the best here and to begin to form my army, then I vill have to adorn myself with your human gold! Fine, be that vhat it may, I vill capture every championship in the vorld of vestling! And then, everyone vill bow down before their dark lord, Count Jakob Furis!"
*Furis quickly swings his cape around menacingly, but ends up sweeping his own legs and falling on his ass. Ceese starts laughing*
[Ceese:] You know what....You are the most disappointing vampire I have ever seen....Count Chocula and The Count from Sesame Street got more balls and street cred than you! Do me a favor, step out of my ring, go to the pizza place and eat a garlic pizza in the sun with a cross around your neck!
[Furis:] "But... that vould kill me! A-ha! You have foolishly vevealed yourself to be a clear enemy of the great Furis!! And so the only cross you vill see is at your funeral! But uh, that vould mean you are DEAD so technically you can not see THAT cross either! Vhat a shame- You are 'forsaken' like NDP show!!"
*Furis winds up in what appears to be a punch*
[Furis:] "Prepare to be Furisized!""
*The attempt at "Furisization" fails as soon as he takes a step forward and again trips over his cape.*
[John:] "Note to Jakob Furis' tailors: Flowing capes are OUT this season and have been since the 1600's. Just a fun fashion tip Jean passed along to me backstage."
*Ceese stands there laughing jubilantly at Furis' failure. Furis manages to get up again and this time succeeds in actually pushing Ceese back a few inches. Ceese's smile quickly fades and he goes to confront Furis but then gets an odd look on his face as none other then Indy James has run out from the crowd into the ring! He blindsides Furis with a lariat and then begins putting the boots to him! Ceese just just stands there nodding and takes a shot or two himself but it's Indy doing the majority of the damage here. Finally Furis is able to roll out of the ring and starts to run away as Indy chases him. Ceese resumes laughing and begins pantomiming Furis' shocked reaction at Indy's entrance..until...*
“Rebel Yell (Live)” by Toby Rand hits the speakers bringing out the "Omega", Owen Churchill!! He is carrying a microphone and doesn't appear to be too pleased at what we all just saw!*
[Churchill:] Julian Caesaro...bravo. Bravo. Thank you for proving the point I've been trying to establish for the past few weeks. I'll get to you in a moment, but first...ladies and gentlemen, if you've been watching any UBL programming over the past few weeks, you know who I am. If you are unfamiliar, allow me to formally introduce myself. I am "The Omega" Owen Churchill. I am here for one reason. To revolutionize the UBL. The tyranny and political backstabbing of the professional wrestling scene has gone on for FAR too long. I have heard, from wrestlers in that backstage area, from stagehands, from office members and even from you, the great UBL fans, that you are tired of this hypocrisy. I have brought it upon myself and myself alone to bring about revolution to professional wrestling. To end the pandering of office politics, to end the rampant disrespect of this company's competitors....
*Churchill pauses for a moment. Caesaro looks on intently, waiting for Churchill to get to his point*
[Churchill:]...and that disrespect includes sneak attacks. Which brings me to you, Caesaro. I planned on coming here tonight as a spectator. An innocent bystander. But after watching the stunt you just pulled...that is a deed that cannot go unpunished. Men like you are exactly what's wrong with professional wrestling today. Blatantly setting up your opponents, using any means necessary to get ahead. Men like you are the exact reason revolution is needed here in the UBL. Men like you are the exact reason I am here...
[Ceese:] Hold up, kid....First of all, you don't come out here and insult greatness like that. 2nd of all, I had nothing to do with that. That was all Indy. Let me tell you something, Theta....Alpha....Delta Burke...whatever greek sign you call yourself....I am King Royale....*the crowd starts to boo* I am the most gifted wrestler today! By the looks of you...you are nowhere near my level. Matter of fact....I think you are on Furis level....If you are talking about starting a "revolution", it will pale in comparison to The Royale Age! So word to the wise, kid.....Stay out of my business and I will spare you! Now go start your little revolution somewhere else....
[Churchill:] Julian, all I have to say in retort is this...every revolution needs an opening statement. A first shot. I didn't want to make you my first target, but you've left me with no other choice. I hope you are prepared.
*Omega begins walking to the ring as Ceese clears some of the Palace set away, ready for a brawl*
[John:] "And folks, an impromptu brawl is about to break out right now between Julian Caesaro and Owen Churchill! Both of these men have been very vocal over the past months about their intentions for UBL and it looks like they are directly in each other's paths of destiny here. Is this the first battle of the "Royale Age" vs. the "Revolution?" If it is, it looks like Sergeant Drake Yoshida also recognizes this and has run out. Do we have a match? Yes, yes we have a match!! Drake is going to referee it it, let's get to the ring!"
Match #3: Owen "Omega" Churchill vs. Julian Caesaro
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[John:] "Fans, I'm admittedly a bit confused as to what just went down here. Drake told the timekeeper to ring the bell, but we usually don't have time limits in UBL. At least, we didn't before this match. Perhaps there was an injury after Owen executed his Omegaplex on Julian Caesaro?"
Owen Churchill (-) [Time Stoppage - 15:00] (-) Julian Caesaro
*Drake is trying to hold back both men from continuing the fight and finally security comes out to help. John walks over from the ramp into the ring to interview Drake.*
[John:] "Not to put you on the spot here boss, just doing my job. What exactly happened here?"
*Drake looks a bit nervous but is trying to look authoritative*
[Drake:] "I...I can explain. You see, during the match I got word from the back that Kyle Walker has chosen to compete tonight! "
*The crowd erupts in applause*
[John:] "That's incredible! He didn't even know that he was going to compete BEFORE the show started and now he's saying he will?!"
[Drake:] "Yes the courage of OrochiGeese has no doubt rubbed off on him!"
*Omega rolls his eyes and the crowd gives Drake a huge smattering of boos*
[Drake:] "And so we simply can not afford to spend any more time on this NON-sanctioned encounter when we still have more official Nexus Tournament matches to get to tonight."
*The crowd continues booing, clearly wanting to see a real finale of the match we just witnessed*
[Drake:] "No, this match is OVER. As the official for this match, I have ruled it a time limit draw. Lucky thing for Omega too as Ceese was on the verge of a comeback to put the match away."
*Ceese nods in agreement with Drake but the crowd DROWNS Drake out in boos before clearly starting a "Bull shit" chant.*
[Drake:] "Enough! We have our next Nexus Match to get to. I am moving the Juan Leche vs. Karl Wunderlin match to right now so that Kyle and Gene will be in the main event in order to give Kyle maximum time to recover. So Kyle and Juan should come out now for their match!"
*The crowd is boo'ing Drake out of the arena but he's not focused on that as much as he is on evading the piercing stare of one Omega Churchill. Ceese has a smirk on his face and leaves the ring on his own but security is still forming a solid wall around Omega. Finally, Drake takes off in a fast pace to backstage as the fans pelt him with garbage.*
[John:] "Well fans, it looks like we have a lot of developments. It sure does seem though that if Drake wanted to give Kyle more time to rest, it wouldn't have hurt to allow Ceese and Omega to finish their match. But what do I know? It's just my first night here!"
*The fans begin to chant "OM-E-GA" in support of Churchill as he heads back up the ramp, through the curtains, and to the back area. Even Ceese gets some support from the fans as he leaves.*
[John:] "Either the fans appreciated Ceese's competitiveness in the match or just his humiliation of Jakob Furis, a sentiment I can certainly support myself. But now it's time to get our next two competitors in the ring - Karl Wunderlin and Juan Leche. Juan Leche is a former PW-W IHWJ (International Hybrid Wrestling Junior) Champion who became quite a superstar as a result of his success there. Karl Wunderlin is a fierce competitor who has shown that his entire body is a weapon. He definitely outweighs Leche here but Leche has the speed advantage. Not much is known about Karl's past so it's hard to know who has the experience edge but I'd tend to give it to Leche, knowing what a pressure cooker PW-W was. OrochiGeese left that place a changed man as has anyone who stepped foot in their ring. But Karl appears to be just as hungry as Leche and so this will be a very hard fought match, for sure."
Match #4: Juan Leche vs. Karl Wunderlin
Nexus Championship Tournament Round 2
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[John:] "You gotta hand it to Karl for taking that offensive onslaught that Juan dished out! Juan looked like a man possessed in that ring, stepping up his game considerably from his previous victorious matches in UBL. As he gets closer to the finals, you gotta figure he smells that Nexus gold. But Karl did not back down and got Juan in a number of difficult predicaments as well, including painful-looking submission attempts. In the end, it was Juan's incredible speed and aerial ability that allowed him to hit three awe-inspiring lucha leaps in a row before executing the match winning hurrancanrana."
Juan Leche (O) [Hurracanrana - 21:45] (X) Karl Wunderlin
[John:] "And the fans are giving their applause to both men. Juan and Karl even exchange a hand-shake. Karl goes backstage allowing Juan to soak up the cheers. I think we're about ready for intermission now and- no, what's this!?"
*A man jumps out of the crowd wearing red and white and carrying a chair. The fans immediately pop when they see him...but then boo him just as quickly when they see what he's up to*
[John:] "That's...that's Shady! Mr. Canada X of PW-W fame! And he has just attacked Juan Leche from behind with that chair! I believe he used to call it the Canadian Hardcore chair of Justice!"
*He only gets in a few shots before Genji Security swarms the ring for the second time tonight. Shady exits through the crowd again and medics help Juan Leche.*
[John:] "Wow, it appears that Shady's target has been revealed. For the last few weeks he has been sending ominous messages to the UBL office referring to getting revenge on a man from his past. Juan and Shady were top rivals in PW-W and it loooks like Juan is his intended target. This will be both a literal and figurative headache to Leche as he advances to the next round of the Nexus Tournament."
*Leche shrugs off the medical team's help and walks backstage on his own with an angry look.*
[John:] "And NOW it's time for intermission. I'll see you when we're ready to get back to the show!"
*John goes backstage and the fans get up, stretch their legs, and start walking around. Intermission! Those who got a hankerin for some home-styled cooking considerably change their expectations and stand in line for Park's Chippy's stand! He has some Thanksgiving style favorites...only done in a very different style. Cornish hens stuffed with haggis and mutton pie greet many confused and no longer hungry american fans. But seeing as the Park's Chippy stand has the food monopoly in the arena, the fans do the best they can.
At the merchandise table a number of new offerings are being sold. A "Caesaro's Palace - Royale Era" shirt is a hot seller tonight and is selling just about the same as an all-white shirt with the word "Omega" in front and "revolution" in back. A Thanksgiving shirt with Furis' head on a turkey's body is also a great seller, if not a seasonal limited shirt. In addition to selling shirts, UBL also has a special program for fans to donate to the BINGO family after what happened to Johnny at the Moon show. Those who donate get a Johnny BINGO friendship headband. Many fans from Buffalo have come down to the show and are giving their support both vocally and monetarily for Johnny. And on a less somber note, HaLAWLoween DVD's are selling like candy corncakes. Intermission ends as the fans settle down and John comes back with a microphone.*
[John:] "And folks I am getting word that a heated discussion is going on backstage."
*We go backstage to the Orochi Army locker room where we see Orochi Geese, Holly, Kyle Walker, Agent 0, and Drake Yoshida. Kyle is resting on a bed as medics tape him up while Holly has tears in her eyes.*
[Holly:] "Kyle, you have NOTHING to prove! If you go out there, you'll just get hurt even worse!"
[Kyle:] "Robin, I have to go out there and show Nicole she can't bully us around."
[Holly:] "You almost got killed out there!!"
[Geese:] "I have the power to postpone your match Kyle. I am proud of your passion here but I must agree with Holly: discretion is the better part of valor."
[Kyle:] "What!! But you were the one who wanted me to take this match in the first place!"
[Geese:] "Yes, I did...BEFORE Nicole attacked you. Currently, you are in no shape to compete."
[Kyle:] "Well Geese, remember what you told me after the last show about taking opportunities cuz the universe balances itself out anyway? That's what is going on here. The only reason I made it this far in the tournament was cuz Bak Fu got cheated and tonight I got cheated. So I finally feel right taking this match cuz now I have to earn a victory and a half to cover for last time."
[Holly:] "You FEEL right now? You're bandaged from head to toe! You're a walking target!!"
[Kyle:] "Just like I was to Nicole. But when she knocked me down, I got up again. And I'm gonna show her that us Walker's are tougher then she thinks. She can't keep us down. I'm not scared of her and when I go out there and have the best match of my career, you'll see she ain't as bad as people say she is!"
[Holly:] "But she IS that bad! Did you see what she did to Juli Krieger!? And you look like a freaking mummy right now!!"
[Kyle:] "She didn't break my spirit!"
*Kyle goes to pump his fist to prove a point but winces in pain as he raises his arm*
[Holly:] "Oh i can't watch this. Geese, make this stop, PLEASE!"
[Geese:] "Kyle, Gene Starr is not someone to be trifled with. He can break your arms and legs and will do so if he deems it necessary to win a match. I am not sure you realize what you are getting yourself into..."
[Holly:] "This is all MY fault...I never wanted Kyle to have to pay for my actions!"
[Kyle:] "Stop it, I'm my own damn person, I can take care of myself. Robin, this isn't your fault. It's Dramesi's and I know Geese is cookin something up to take care of her. As for me, my best way to stick it to Dramesi is to go out there and compete, and that's just what I'm gonna do."
*Kyle continues wincing as he gets out of bed but does it on his own power.*
[Holly:] "Geese!"
[Geese:] "Holly, this has to be his choice. We can't make it for him any more now then we could before tonight. And if this was you, you know you'd be wanting in that ring just as much as he does."
[Holly:] "But you'd stop me!!"
[Geese:] "Have I ever tried to stop you? *Geese grins* "Could I ever really succeed?"
*Holly's mouth contorts in a grin of her own and she punches him in the shoulder lightly*
[Holly:] "Not on your life. But damn it, this is my little brother-"
[Geese:] "Your little brother stood toe to toe with Bak Fu and could have won that match on his own. He has made it through the rigors of both the Valiant Wrestling Alliance and Pro Wrestling Wild. He has defeated Naja Mask and Centurion and has not backed down from any challenge. He is a man now, Holly. And while I think he's making the wrong choice tonight, it's HIS choice to make."
[Holly:] "You always have to be so damn reasonable."
[Kyle:] "So it's ok? I can do it?"
[Geese:] "We have another few matches before yours. I am going to run you through a sequence of exercises. If you can pass them to my satisfaction, I will allow you to compete."
*Holly breathes a sigh of relief but Kyle looks angry*
[Kyle:] "Hey! What happened to being a man now and being able to make my own decisions?"
[Geese:] "You're making those decisions in my promotion and my interests are involved. I have decisions to make that outrank yours. If you can survive a warm-up session with me, then I'll let you go out there."
[Kyle:] "Fine."
[Geese:] "Agent 0, make sure Dramesi is long gone and that MAXIMUM security is utilized for the main event if Kyle can compete."
[Agent 0:] "Yes sir."
[Geese:] "Drake, it appears we have time to do what we discussed earlier. Just make sure "he" is protected sufficiently before it takes place."
[Drake:] "Yes, sir. And Kyle...I think I misjudged your character. You do belong in UBL afterall."
*Drake goes over to shake Kyle's hand and Kyle nods back to him. We go back to John in the arena.*
[John:] "Wow, I can't believe Kyle wants to go through with his match. But we still have a while to go to see if Orochi Geese deems him able to wrestle. So for now, let's get to our next Nexus Title Tournament match - D.F. Allen of BINGO-1 vs. Johnny Brooke! Johnny entered this tournament after coming off a HUGE victory against Gene Starr earlier this year. And he has had no problem advancing in this tournament, his mindset is confident and clear. That is in stark contrast to the pain and confusion D.F. Allen must be feeling after personally witnessing what happened to his teammate Johnny BINGO at the Lunar Battalion show. We still have no answers as to the location or health of Johnny and D.F. has been taking it pretty hard. Many Buffalo-based fans of BINGO-1 have come down today to support D.F. but no one knows what kind of mental or physical condition he'll be in tonight. We're about to find out."
*Johnny comes to the ring to a chorus of boos as he wears a "Brooke Broke Ya" shirt" and a smirk. And when DF Allen comes out, the fans erupt in applause.*
[John:] "The fans are fully supporting D.F. here and for good reason."
*DF nods to them but looks conflicted...that is until Brooke rips up a "Johnny BINGO" poster at ringside. DF Allen charges to ringside with a fury in his eyes not seen before!*
[John:] "Wow, what was Johnny thinking THERE? We're about to have a brawl!"
Match #5: DF Allen vs. Johnny Brooke
Nexus Championship Tournament Round 2
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[John:] "There's no doubt that DF was enraged during this match due to "Brooke's breaking" of the Bingo sign. And while that intensity worked early to give DF control and bust Johnny open, I think it served to distract and fatigue DF later on, allowing Johnny easy access to weaken his limbs. By the end, DF was limping due to continuing to use his flying knee despite the work that Johnny had done on it. And so Johnny just had to grab DF in a rolling heel hook to put him away and secure the victory."
DF Allen (X) [Rolling Heel Hook - 17:27] (O) Johnny Brooke
*Johnny Brooke leaves while celebrating. DF remains in the ring.*
[John:] "DF Looks very despondent here and...wait, what's this?"
*VD Dod and Fat Lip of LRI come out to ringside and are laughing at DF Allen from the ramp*
[John:] "Oh this is just too much! The same wrestlers responsible for launching BINGO into outer space are now mocking DF for his hard fought loss. DF is just too tired and hurt to even attempt to attack them...but it appears that feeling isn't mutual!! They're about to run to the-
"Not so fast" - bellows out from the curtains as Drake Yoshida walks out with a microphone.
[Drake:] "I've had enough of LRI causing chaos around here and so has Geese. You see, it turns out that we invited you two here for a reason tonight. We wanted you and everyone here to know that the BINGO-1 team is going to have to drop out of the Battalion because they are a member short."
*The crowd boos and LRI continues laughing.*
[Drake:] "At least...that is what WOULD have happened had Johnny gotten injured in an actual match. But you went to despicable lengths to get rid of Bingo. And by "despicable," I mean methods that got Geese fined by thw US government for allowing a wrestler to get lost in space."
*LRI proceed to laugh at this.*
[Drake:] "I'm a lenient guy, so is Geese. But the second ANY of you on this roster do something that negatively affects him, that's the second you're on his list for revenge. And so we have decided to give BINGO-1 some assistance in this Battalion by bending the rules. The Destroyer has gone to look for Johnny Bingo and so that leaves the entire BINGO-1 Battalion as just DF Allen. But one thing the Destroyer did before he left was confer with DF over which two men they thought Johnny would pick to back them up."
*Two huge men walk out from the curtain from behind Drake and advance towards LRI.*
[Drake:] "Let me introduce you all to TAX and Tommy Bongo, the newest additions to the BINGO-1 Battalion. And I think you two are going to enjoy meeting them...in fact, let's have a match RIGHT NOW."
*The fans are cheering wildly, especially those with BINGO-1 shirts on. TAX and Tommy chase LRI into the ring and begin brawling with them, sending them outside with a double clothesline. VD and Fat Lip look at each other in a panic and begin to run into the crowd.*
[Drake:] "Eh eh. And if you two refuse to face them, LRI will be thrown out of the Battalion!"
*The fans cheer again and Coach McGuirk runs down to the ring as a ref. DF Allen is helped backstage by medics as Drake walks backstage as well to a surprising amount of cheers. LRI gets back into the ring.*
[John:] "Hey don't look at me fans, we got an additional match! And call me crazy or naive, but somehow i don't see Drake ending THIS impromptu match early!"
Match #6: Tornado Tag: BINGO-1 vs. LRI
Tommy Bongo/TAX vs. VD Dod/Fat Lip
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[John:] "It's hard to say this was adequate revenge for what LRI did to Johnny Bingo but it sure was a start. The two new members of the BINGO-1 Battalion punished LRI here and didn't appear content to just end the match until they were sufficiently convinced LRI was beaten up. That did give LRI a number of chances to turn the tide but I think it was pretty clear who had the upper hand in this match. My only question is where was the LRI ring leader, Stuart Robinson, during all of this?"
TAX/Tommy Bongo (O) [Backdrop Hold - 21:30] (X) VD Dod/Fat Lip
*Both teams leave without further incident...on account of Genji Security escorting them*
[John:] "It's time for our next match. Hank Panky has been given just three more chances to win a match in UBL or else he will not be given a contract. Alternatively, Drake Yoshida was very impressed with Park Hyun Soo who had a great match at the previous show against Gene Starr but fell just short. Park would like to get some momentum going while Hank...well, he just want to stay around. Will he do so or will the "Burning Kid" take his next step towards blazing a successful career here?
Match #7 - Hank Panky vs. Park Hyun-Soo
Hank Panky Trial Series
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[John:] "Ahh, you hate to see that. But some people...they just...i guess they just can't bend in certain directions. Hank got injured during one of Park's lightning fast attempts at a small package and was unable to escape the pinfall. It looks like it may just be a freak injury, and hopefully not a long term one. But Park certainly was controlling this match well up until that point and dominated Hank."
Hank Panky (X) [Small Package KO (!?) - 7:23] (O) Park Hyun-Soo
[John:] "And the medics have come out...for the third time tonight...to take Hank Panky away. Meanwhile Park celebrates with the fans. Folks, I think we're about ready for our main-"
*Seven Nation Army by the White Stripes hits, the crowd boos and out comes out an arrogant, frosted haired competitor known as Daddy PrimeTime. He approaches the ring and takes his sweet time to enter. DPT grabs the mike and addresses the UBL crowd.*
[DPT:] I know, your booing because I don't have a match tonight, I must say I am also disappointed that I'm not competing, but fear not I have come out to make your night better. First, for the few of you who don't know me, my name is Daddy Primetime, not Daddy Daytime Soap, or Daddy Evening News, its Daddy Fuckin' Primetime. Now with that out of the way I have to say I am unimpressed with the UBL. I've looked over the roster and I see bland wrestler after bland wrestler. Hell you dumbasses are evening willing to watch a chump like Julian Caesaro wrestle. But I am here tonight to announce my intention of destroying every wrestler in the ubl, and it starts with the Dambman...or Damb-I'm-Lame-man. I look at you and your stable of weak ass punks and think to myself its time to clean up the Damb-trash. While I was reviewing your bio it seems Damb you used to be a fan, well it looks like you should have remained a fan. Damb it might not be tonight, it might not be tomorrow, but I am making destroying your career my number one priority.
*The crowd continues to boo DPT*
[DPT:] Ya see damb, they are booing you. They think your lame. They are saying "DPT will you please take out the trash," and my only response to that is yes, I will. In closing all I have to say to you Lamb-man is watch your back, because I will kick your head off.
*As DPT finishes up his sentence, the Bure chant hits. Instead of going into Damb's FPCPP theme, "Rap Is The Language Of A Man's Soul" hits the speakers. As the J-Rapper implores the fans to ROW ROW FIGHT DA POWA Damb comes out in civilian attire, wearing jeans and his NS-D jersey. The crowd gives him a respectable pop.*
[Damb:] It's so good of Drake Yoshida to give the handicapped opportunities in the UBL. Long time no see DPT, all those smack hits must have rendered you deaf and dumb. I've got a burning question that I think the fans would like an answer to. How do you keep your hair like that? KMD thinks...(crowd pops) KMD thinks that it's premature aging, while Jae (crowd pops) thinks it's kept up by spunk. Y'know, from all the verbal masturbation you do. Me, I think it's just one of many, many bad decisions made regarding your life; like when your mother decided to let all those guys run train on her without protection nine months before you were born.
*The crowd chuckles uncomfortably at that one.*
[Damb:] On a more serious note, why is it that I get all of the delusional heels with lame comebacks? It's like a curse, first that UIG goober and now you. I mean shit, Lamb-man? Are you insinuating I'm a furry or something? That doesn't even make sense. Really now, Dick Piercing Trick, coming up with insulting names isn't that hard. Douche Pussy Troglodyte, Dookie Play Tranny, Dates Paraplegic Toddlers, etc, etc. I could spend the rest of the promo insulting you, but it gets boring after a while. Lemme just say this, you step to me or the NS-D again, and I'll be stealing your "head kicking " gimmick with extreme prejudice.
*Damb fakes a knee to DPT's face but falls just short, instead getting up close and personal with him. DPT is seething while Damb smiles that trademark smile. He says something inaudible to DPT, then leaves the ring to soak in the adulation of a new crowd.*
[John:] "Wow...it looks like another two recently debuting wrestlers have stormed onto the scene here and aren't so great at making friends. Dambman was backstage celebrating with his NiSan-Dan after their victory before but DPT wasn't too impressed with Damb's past efforts. It looks like these two are going to have quite the match at our next show. But for now, it's time for the main event!"
*Gene Starr comes down to ringside, more cocky then usual. He yawns a few times and does some very exaggerated morning stretching.*
[John:] "Either Gene doesn't think Kyle is gonna wrestle or he isn't worried one bit if he does."
*After a few second delay, "Kick 'em when he's down" goes onto the speakers.*
[John:] "That's typically the theme song of OG-Joshi World Champion Holly but it seems she is 'lending it' to her brother tonight in a show of support. And here he is! Bandaged head to toe but standing and even jogging on his own power! Kyle Walker is truly a marvel to behold!"
*The applause is deafening as Kyle jogs down to the ring with a confident but serious look. Gene shakes his head in mock disbelief and dismissiveness.*
[John:] "Even on a healthy day, this would be a tall order for Kyle. Gene has more experience, more strength, better striking, and superior submission abilities. He's the current M-DWF Champion as well as a previous holder of many titles. Kyle, for his part, was one of the holders of the prestigious VWA 6 Man Championships and his definitive in-ring advantages over Gene are speed and agility. But most of all, as much of a cliche as this is, Kyle Walker has more heart then many people can even dream of having. And as strong as the will and fighting spirit of Gene Starr are, he may actually be underestimating the heart and energy of Kyle Walker here, which is a crucial mistake for anyone to make."
*Kyle manages to have enough power to vault over the ropes which causes Gene's expression to turn a bit more serious.*
[John:] "And we are ready for our main event! This will be the final Round 2 matchup of the Nexus Title Tournament. Whomever wins this match will face Jang Bae in the next round! Let's get to it!"
Match #8: Kyle Walker vs. Gene Starr
Nexus Championship Tournament Round 2
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[John:] "What can you say about Kyle Walker there? He gave his all but fell short to Gene's submission expertise. He just couldn't fight out of Gene's Starr Shooter and appeared to even pass out in the hold before the ref helped him regain consiousness. Kyle refused to tap out despite the pain of the match and everything that happened with Nicole. But Gene, to his credit, did not hold back and respected Kyle's abilities and that allowed him to do what he had to do to win the match. Gene looked very polished and confident and I think it's going to take a huge effort on the part of Jang Bae to defeat him."
Kyle Walker (X) [Starr Shooter - 16:44] (O) Gene Starr
*OrochiGeese and Holly run out to the ring as Gene Starr bails out. Geese and Holly help Kyle out of the ring. The medics come but he refuses them and he walks backstage on his own power as Holly and Geese follow him. When Kyle gets to the ramp he turns around and thanks the fans. Holly hugs him and raises his hand up. Meanwhile, Gene gets back into the ring and gives his own special show of respect by declaring Orochi Army is "Number 1". Geese smirks and looks like he's about to walk to the ring but Holly stops him and the three go backstage without further incident. Holly has tears in her eyes but this time, of pride.*
[John:] "Wow, Gene almost got an scheduled 1 on 1 meeting with the boss there but I think Holly had just enough chaos for the night. And what a night it was as Mr. Starr has advanced to the next round of the Nexus Title tournament along with Jang Bae, Johnny Brooke, and Juan Leche. UBL will come at you next with the fifth week of Battalion action emanating from Buffalo, New York. See you then, fans!"
*Fin*
*The Battle Chamber comes alive with the sound of "Fanfare" signaling an early ratings victory for the show!
"Party has gained 5 Nielson points!*
*Enemy has stolen one flask*
*GET YE FLASK*
Seriously though, I just had to get that out of my system. It's time we turn snarky commentary over for good to real time announcer happenings and so it's my pleasure to introduce the new
[John:] "Hello and welcome to the UBL Open for November 2008. If I can indulge myself in a brief intro, my name is John Randolph and you may recognize me as one of the interviewers from New Damage Pro Wrestling. Well, my work was noticed by the good Sergeant Drake Yoshida during an interview with a certain creature from the night and Mr. Yoshida liked my insults so much that he offered me this position as the new host of the Open shows. I can only hope to follow the great job Jean Carter has done in the past."
[John:] "Tonight we feature the second round of action in the Nexus Title Tournament in addition to two other exciting matches. Let's have a look up on the BattleTron as to what tonight holds in store for us.
*The BattleTron displays six matches*
1? - (T) Kyle Walker vs. Gene Starr
2 - NiSan-Dan vs. The Dudes
Debut of Caesaro's Palace with special guest: Jakob Furis
3 - (T) Jang Bae vs. Elvis Archibal
Intermission
4 - (T) DF Allen vs. Johnny Brooke
5 - Hank Panky Trial Series: Hank Panky vs. Park Hyun Soo
6 - (T) Juan Leche vs. Karl Wunderlin
[John:] "Let's get right to our first match of tonight. After some controversy at the end of the previous Open show, Kyle Walker was declared the winner of his first round Nexus Tournament match against Bak Fu. However, Kyle has still not confirmed whether or not he actually wants to wrestle tonight or if he intends to give Gene Starr a bye. A pity, really, but Kyle believes that since he did not win his match fairly against Bak, that he doesn't deserve to advance in this tournament. Or at least, he believed that at the end of the previous show. Perhaps OrochiGeese has helped him to change his mind over the last few months. I suppose the time for speculation is over as Kyle is going to give his answer right now. If he agrees to the match, then Gene Starr will face him right after. And here comes Kyle to the ring."
Kyle Walker's decision
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[John:] "And Kyle has just suffered a vicious and heinous attack at the hands of Nicole Dramesi! The medics have rushed onto the scene in addition to OrochiGeese and Drake Yoshida. I can only suppose Holly is backstage under close protection by Genji Security. It appeared as if Gene Starr was going to come out to hear Kyle's challenge first hand but Nicole blindsided Kyle before Gene's music could even start. This will definitely create some disorder on the show but most importantly, how hurt is Kyle Walker?"
*Drake Yoshida quickly walks over to John and whispers to him as the medics are putting Kyle on a stretcher and slowly carrying him backstage. OrochIGeese isn't even acknowledging the audience and instead appears to be lost in a combination of thought and rage.*
[John:] "Ok, I just got word from the Sergeant that we are going to go right to the next match for the night - Jang Bae vs. Elvis Archibal. I'll try to update you all on Kyle's condition as the night continues. I'm sure we haven't heard the last of this, what with Kyle being the protege of the boss, Orochi Geese."
[John:] "As for now, our next match should be plenty interestng in of itself. Jang Bae is getting a rematch against Elvis Archibal with a lot more on the line this time then their previous match: a match where Elvis managed to knock Jang Bae out with his "Shake, Rattle, and Roll" crucifix powerbomb finisher. Jang has acknowledged that as his toughest loss so far in professional wrestling and he swears to have learned from it thanks to the help of Thunder Strike. However, Jang has also been very involved in the Universal Battalion league and there is a question as to his fatigue level from that, not to mention the grueling, bloody match he had with Elader to make it to this round. Elvis is coming off a very decisive victory against Crimson Tide and a strong year here in UBL. Will Jang be able to avenge his loss in this condition or will Elvis continue his undefeated streak and advance to the semi-finals of this tournament? Jean Carter told me that you all love rhetorical questions so I hope you just got your money's worth, folks. Let's get to the match."
Match #1: Jang Bae vs. Elvis Archibal
Nexus Championship Tournament Round 2
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[John:] "Wow, what a hard fought match that was! As the 10 minute mark approached, both men were neck and neck and Elvis decided to bust out his "Shake, Rattle, and Roll" finisher that knocked out Jang last time! The crowd held their breath but Jang not only kept his consciousness, he actually kicked out of the manuever! And then, Elvis managed to kick out of Jang's "Running w/ Scissors!" It came down to Jang using a new manuever, a Shining Triangle, to get Elvis to tap out after working on his arm throughout the match. This series is now tied but Jang won the right to advance in this Nexus Title Tournament!"
Jang Bae (O) [Shining Triangle - 13:12] (X) Elvis Archibal
[John:] "Ok and now it's time to get to a match between two teams hoping to get UBL contracts. This match also stems from the Trial by Fire 2 match where Dude Thunder outlasted Dambman. It seems that Damb's NiSan-Dan group wants a chance for retribution against the Dudes group, which will be represented by Dude Fire and Dude Death tonight. Sergeant Yoshida was impressed by both Damb and Dude's performances, despite falling short in the Trial match, and gave them contracts. If these two teams can also win over Drake, then they can also add their names to the roster. The question is will any personal animosity get in the way of them showing their best, or conversely, will Drake reward them for intensity against their rivals. Only time and Drake's next missive will tell."
Match #2: NiSan-Dn vs. the Dudes
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[John:] "You gotta hand it to both teams here, they really brought their passion! NiSan-Dan won the match by making use of tag team and outside tactics along with that huge Rolling Fireman's Carry from Jae Viral. But the Dudes took the fight to the NiSan-Dan throughout the entire match! I won't be surprised to see both groups accepted and put in another match in the future."
KMD/Jae Viral (O) [Rolling Fireman Carry - 18:21] (X) Dude Fire/Dude Death
[John:] "And now we come to the part of the night where I will take a perverse glee in watching someone ELSE attempt to interview the verbal virus that is "Count" Jakob Furis. I do not know this Julian Caesaro and I certainly have no ill will towards him but my friend, you really just opened up the path to a nightmarish existence by inviting this vampire into your Royale home. You'll see...it starts with an interview and it ends with him calling you at 4 in the morning asking you to bring over sardines. So I'm just going to sit back and hope he takes enough of a liking to you to leave ME alone."
Caesaro's Palace
*Kanye West's "Flashing Lights" come on...and we see the Royale One, Julian Caesaro! For the fans that know him, cheers for him and for those that don't, boos, because he looks arrogant. Ceese is decked out in a a black suit with the words "Royale" written on the back in diamonds (Ode to Mr. Perfect). He steps in the ring and looks at the UBL logo. He stands in the middle of the ring and goes into a GQ pose. He pulls out his own personal mic that is gold and has the words "King Royale" on the side of it. He signals for the music to be cut off and is met with a mixed reaction*
[Ceese:] What It do Playas and Playettes! Welcome to the debut of Caesaro's Palace on UBL! I am your host with the most, the kid that loves to boast, and have ladies screaming from coast to coast, Julian Caesaro!... Now this is new territory for the Royale One! Hopefully, this territory will be King Royale's new land. The Royale Age is coming and there is no one that can stop that. *The crowd starts to boo* Now for my 1st guest....*Ceese looks at the card in disbelief* Are you serious? Great....My 1st guest needs no introduction...because im not going to give it to him....Here is Jakob Furis!
*Furis music starts to play and he comes out menacingly....but the crowd is not buying it. Perhaps because John is rolling his eyes or perhaps because Furis has toilet paper on his shoes. Either way, he attempts to make his way down the ramp. He runs up on a 6 year old kid and tries to scare him...but the kid threw his drink at him...After that, he runs down to the ring, trips on his cape, and falls flat on his face...The crowd is laughing hard. Ceese has a "WTF" look on his face. Finally, Furis gets in the ring. He tries to scare Ceese but Ceese has a look like he is about to start cracking up. Furis finally sits down and the pain begins.*
[Ceese:] *trying to hold his laughter in* "W--W---Welcome to the Palace, Furis
[Furis:] Vit's a pleasure to be here, Veese
[Ceese:] Its Ceese.
[Furis:] Thats what I said...Veese
[Ceese:] Its Ceese!
[Furis:] Vhats Vrong vit vu? I said Veese!
*Ceese is looking at Furis like he wants to superkick him*
[Ceese:] Lets start the show, please? my 1st question is how did you get your start in UBL?
[Furis:] "I started first in NDP and impressed the vorld of vestling so much that UBL invited me! Some say that OrochiGeese himself vas in such awe of my abilities that he vanted to vecruit me for his Orochi Army!! However, I am no footsoldier, I am the leader of the Army of Evil! And so Geese must bow down to ME!"
[Ceese:] Yeah...OG is scared of you *Rolls his eyes*. Anyway, I heard about your losing streak in NDP? Care to comment on that?
[Furis:] "Vhere did you hear such lies!? I am the most dominant vestler in NDP history! Who here has not vatched the losing streak of Evan Divine ever since I taught him a lesson!? Ve have heard no vords from him either! But me, everyone hears from me more then they vould ever vant to!!"
[Ceese:] Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigggggghhhhhttt....My last question is.... I know this is a long shot...But when will we see Furis with a title around his waist?
[Furis:] "Gold is not the color of vhat I seek. Only RED is! For red is the color of blood!! But I vealize that to be considered by everyone as the best here and to begin to form my army, then I vill have to adorn myself with your human gold! Fine, be that vhat it may, I vill capture every championship in the vorld of vestling! And then, everyone vill bow down before their dark lord, Count Jakob Furis!"
*Furis quickly swings his cape around menacingly, but ends up sweeping his own legs and falling on his ass. Ceese starts laughing*
[Ceese:] You know what....You are the most disappointing vampire I have ever seen....Count Chocula and The Count from Sesame Street got more balls and street cred than you! Do me a favor, step out of my ring, go to the pizza place and eat a garlic pizza in the sun with a cross around your neck!
[Furis:] "But... that vould kill me! A-ha! You have foolishly vevealed yourself to be a clear enemy of the great Furis!! And so the only cross you vill see is at your funeral! But uh, that vould mean you are DEAD so technically you can not see THAT cross either! Vhat a shame- You are 'forsaken' like NDP show!!"
*Furis winds up in what appears to be a punch*
[Furis:] "Prepare to be Furisized!""
*The attempt at "Furisization" fails as soon as he takes a step forward and again trips over his cape.*
[John:] "Note to Jakob Furis' tailors: Flowing capes are OUT this season and have been since the 1600's. Just a fun fashion tip Jean passed along to me backstage."
*Ceese stands there laughing jubilantly at Furis' failure. Furis manages to get up again and this time succeeds in actually pushing Ceese back a few inches. Ceese's smile quickly fades and he goes to confront Furis but then gets an odd look on his face as none other then Indy James has run out from the crowd into the ring! He blindsides Furis with a lariat and then begins putting the boots to him! Ceese just just stands there nodding and takes a shot or two himself but it's Indy doing the majority of the damage here. Finally Furis is able to roll out of the ring and starts to run away as Indy chases him. Ceese resumes laughing and begins pantomiming Furis' shocked reaction at Indy's entrance..until...*
“Rebel Yell (Live)” by Toby Rand hits the speakers bringing out the "Omega", Owen Churchill!! He is carrying a microphone and doesn't appear to be too pleased at what we all just saw!*
[Churchill:] Julian Caesaro...bravo. Bravo. Thank you for proving the point I've been trying to establish for the past few weeks. I'll get to you in a moment, but first...ladies and gentlemen, if you've been watching any UBL programming over the past few weeks, you know who I am. If you are unfamiliar, allow me to formally introduce myself. I am "The Omega" Owen Churchill. I am here for one reason. To revolutionize the UBL. The tyranny and political backstabbing of the professional wrestling scene has gone on for FAR too long. I have heard, from wrestlers in that backstage area, from stagehands, from office members and even from you, the great UBL fans, that you are tired of this hypocrisy. I have brought it upon myself and myself alone to bring about revolution to professional wrestling. To end the pandering of office politics, to end the rampant disrespect of this company's competitors....
*Churchill pauses for a moment. Caesaro looks on intently, waiting for Churchill to get to his point*
[Churchill:]...and that disrespect includes sneak attacks. Which brings me to you, Caesaro. I planned on coming here tonight as a spectator. An innocent bystander. But after watching the stunt you just pulled...that is a deed that cannot go unpunished. Men like you are exactly what's wrong with professional wrestling today. Blatantly setting up your opponents, using any means necessary to get ahead. Men like you are the exact reason revolution is needed here in the UBL. Men like you are the exact reason I am here...
[Ceese:] Hold up, kid....First of all, you don't come out here and insult greatness like that. 2nd of all, I had nothing to do with that. That was all Indy. Let me tell you something, Theta....Alpha....Delta Burke...whatever greek sign you call yourself....I am King Royale....*the crowd starts to boo* I am the most gifted wrestler today! By the looks of you...you are nowhere near my level. Matter of fact....I think you are on Furis level....If you are talking about starting a "revolution", it will pale in comparison to The Royale Age! So word to the wise, kid.....Stay out of my business and I will spare you! Now go start your little revolution somewhere else....
[Churchill:] Julian, all I have to say in retort is this...every revolution needs an opening statement. A first shot. I didn't want to make you my first target, but you've left me with no other choice. I hope you are prepared.
*Omega begins walking to the ring as Ceese clears some of the Palace set away, ready for a brawl*
[John:] "And folks, an impromptu brawl is about to break out right now between Julian Caesaro and Owen Churchill! Both of these men have been very vocal over the past months about their intentions for UBL and it looks like they are directly in each other's paths of destiny here. Is this the first battle of the "Royale Age" vs. the "Revolution?" If it is, it looks like Sergeant Drake Yoshida also recognizes this and has run out. Do we have a match? Yes, yes we have a match!! Drake is going to referee it it, let's get to the ring!"
Match #3: Owen "Omega" Churchill vs. Julian Caesaro
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[John:] "Fans, I'm admittedly a bit confused as to what just went down here. Drake told the timekeeper to ring the bell, but we usually don't have time limits in UBL. At least, we didn't before this match. Perhaps there was an injury after Owen executed his Omegaplex on Julian Caesaro?"
Owen Churchill (-) [Time Stoppage - 15:00] (-) Julian Caesaro
*Drake is trying to hold back both men from continuing the fight and finally security comes out to help. John walks over from the ramp into the ring to interview Drake.*
[John:] "Not to put you on the spot here boss, just doing my job. What exactly happened here?"
*Drake looks a bit nervous but is trying to look authoritative*
[Drake:] "I...I can explain. You see, during the match I got word from the back that Kyle Walker has chosen to compete tonight! "
*The crowd erupts in applause*
[John:] "That's incredible! He didn't even know that he was going to compete BEFORE the show started and now he's saying he will?!"
[Drake:] "Yes the courage of OrochiGeese has no doubt rubbed off on him!"
*Omega rolls his eyes and the crowd gives Drake a huge smattering of boos*
[Drake:] "And so we simply can not afford to spend any more time on this NON-sanctioned encounter when we still have more official Nexus Tournament matches to get to tonight."
*The crowd continues booing, clearly wanting to see a real finale of the match we just witnessed*
[Drake:] "No, this match is OVER. As the official for this match, I have ruled it a time limit draw. Lucky thing for Omega too as Ceese was on the verge of a comeback to put the match away."
*Ceese nods in agreement with Drake but the crowd DROWNS Drake out in boos before clearly starting a "Bull shit" chant.*
[Drake:] "Enough! We have our next Nexus Match to get to. I am moving the Juan Leche vs. Karl Wunderlin match to right now so that Kyle and Gene will be in the main event in order to give Kyle maximum time to recover. So Kyle and Juan should come out now for their match!"
*The crowd is boo'ing Drake out of the arena but he's not focused on that as much as he is on evading the piercing stare of one Omega Churchill. Ceese has a smirk on his face and leaves the ring on his own but security is still forming a solid wall around Omega. Finally, Drake takes off in a fast pace to backstage as the fans pelt him with garbage.*
[John:] "Well fans, it looks like we have a lot of developments. It sure does seem though that if Drake wanted to give Kyle more time to rest, it wouldn't have hurt to allow Ceese and Omega to finish their match. But what do I know? It's just my first night here!"
*The fans begin to chant "OM-E-GA" in support of Churchill as he heads back up the ramp, through the curtains, and to the back area. Even Ceese gets some support from the fans as he leaves.*
[John:] "Either the fans appreciated Ceese's competitiveness in the match or just his humiliation of Jakob Furis, a sentiment I can certainly support myself. But now it's time to get our next two competitors in the ring - Karl Wunderlin and Juan Leche. Juan Leche is a former PW-W IHWJ (International Hybrid Wrestling Junior) Champion who became quite a superstar as a result of his success there. Karl Wunderlin is a fierce competitor who has shown that his entire body is a weapon. He definitely outweighs Leche here but Leche has the speed advantage. Not much is known about Karl's past so it's hard to know who has the experience edge but I'd tend to give it to Leche, knowing what a pressure cooker PW-W was. OrochiGeese left that place a changed man as has anyone who stepped foot in their ring. But Karl appears to be just as hungry as Leche and so this will be a very hard fought match, for sure."
Match #4: Juan Leche vs. Karl Wunderlin
Nexus Championship Tournament Round 2
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[John:] "You gotta hand it to Karl for taking that offensive onslaught that Juan dished out! Juan looked like a man possessed in that ring, stepping up his game considerably from his previous victorious matches in UBL. As he gets closer to the finals, you gotta figure he smells that Nexus gold. But Karl did not back down and got Juan in a number of difficult predicaments as well, including painful-looking submission attempts. In the end, it was Juan's incredible speed and aerial ability that allowed him to hit three awe-inspiring lucha leaps in a row before executing the match winning hurrancanrana."
Juan Leche (O) [Hurracanrana - 21:45] (X) Karl Wunderlin
[John:] "And the fans are giving their applause to both men. Juan and Karl even exchange a hand-shake. Karl goes backstage allowing Juan to soak up the cheers. I think we're about ready for intermission now and- no, what's this!?"
*A man jumps out of the crowd wearing red and white and carrying a chair. The fans immediately pop when they see him...but then boo him just as quickly when they see what he's up to*
[John:] "That's...that's Shady! Mr. Canada X of PW-W fame! And he has just attacked Juan Leche from behind with that chair! I believe he used to call it the Canadian Hardcore chair of Justice!"
*He only gets in a few shots before Genji Security swarms the ring for the second time tonight. Shady exits through the crowd again and medics help Juan Leche.*
[John:] "Wow, it appears that Shady's target has been revealed. For the last few weeks he has been sending ominous messages to the UBL office referring to getting revenge on a man from his past. Juan and Shady were top rivals in PW-W and it loooks like Juan is his intended target. This will be both a literal and figurative headache to Leche as he advances to the next round of the Nexus Tournament."
*Leche shrugs off the medical team's help and walks backstage on his own with an angry look.*
[John:] "And NOW it's time for intermission. I'll see you when we're ready to get back to the show!"
*John goes backstage and the fans get up, stretch their legs, and start walking around. Intermission! Those who got a hankerin for some home-styled cooking considerably change their expectations and stand in line for Park's Chippy's stand! He has some Thanksgiving style favorites...only done in a very different style. Cornish hens stuffed with haggis and mutton pie greet many confused and no longer hungry american fans. But seeing as the Park's Chippy stand has the food monopoly in the arena, the fans do the best they can.
At the merchandise table a number of new offerings are being sold. A "Caesaro's Palace - Royale Era" shirt is a hot seller tonight and is selling just about the same as an all-white shirt with the word "Omega" in front and "revolution" in back. A Thanksgiving shirt with Furis' head on a turkey's body is also a great seller, if not a seasonal limited shirt. In addition to selling shirts, UBL also has a special program for fans to donate to the BINGO family after what happened to Johnny at the Moon show. Those who donate get a Johnny BINGO friendship headband. Many fans from Buffalo have come down to the show and are giving their support both vocally and monetarily for Johnny. And on a less somber note, HaLAWLoween DVD's are selling like candy corncakes. Intermission ends as the fans settle down and John comes back with a microphone.*
[John:] "And folks I am getting word that a heated discussion is going on backstage."
*We go backstage to the Orochi Army locker room where we see Orochi Geese, Holly, Kyle Walker, Agent 0, and Drake Yoshida. Kyle is resting on a bed as medics tape him up while Holly has tears in her eyes.*
[Holly:] "Kyle, you have NOTHING to prove! If you go out there, you'll just get hurt even worse!"
[Kyle:] "Robin, I have to go out there and show Nicole she can't bully us around."
[Holly:] "You almost got killed out there!!"
[Geese:] "I have the power to postpone your match Kyle. I am proud of your passion here but I must agree with Holly: discretion is the better part of valor."
[Kyle:] "What!! But you were the one who wanted me to take this match in the first place!"
[Geese:] "Yes, I did...BEFORE Nicole attacked you. Currently, you are in no shape to compete."
[Kyle:] "Well Geese, remember what you told me after the last show about taking opportunities cuz the universe balances itself out anyway? That's what is going on here. The only reason I made it this far in the tournament was cuz Bak Fu got cheated and tonight I got cheated. So I finally feel right taking this match cuz now I have to earn a victory and a half to cover for last time."
[Holly:] "You FEEL right now? You're bandaged from head to toe! You're a walking target!!"
[Kyle:] "Just like I was to Nicole. But when she knocked me down, I got up again. And I'm gonna show her that us Walker's are tougher then she thinks. She can't keep us down. I'm not scared of her and when I go out there and have the best match of my career, you'll see she ain't as bad as people say she is!"
[Holly:] "But she IS that bad! Did you see what she did to Juli Krieger!? And you look like a freaking mummy right now!!"
[Kyle:] "She didn't break my spirit!"
*Kyle goes to pump his fist to prove a point but winces in pain as he raises his arm*
[Holly:] "Oh i can't watch this. Geese, make this stop, PLEASE!"
[Geese:] "Kyle, Gene Starr is not someone to be trifled with. He can break your arms and legs and will do so if he deems it necessary to win a match. I am not sure you realize what you are getting yourself into..."
[Holly:] "This is all MY fault...I never wanted Kyle to have to pay for my actions!"
[Kyle:] "Stop it, I'm my own damn person, I can take care of myself. Robin, this isn't your fault. It's Dramesi's and I know Geese is cookin something up to take care of her. As for me, my best way to stick it to Dramesi is to go out there and compete, and that's just what I'm gonna do."
*Kyle continues wincing as he gets out of bed but does it on his own power.*
[Holly:] "Geese!"
[Geese:] "Holly, this has to be his choice. We can't make it for him any more now then we could before tonight. And if this was you, you know you'd be wanting in that ring just as much as he does."
[Holly:] "But you'd stop me!!"
[Geese:] "Have I ever tried to stop you? *Geese grins* "Could I ever really succeed?"
*Holly's mouth contorts in a grin of her own and she punches him in the shoulder lightly*
[Holly:] "Not on your life. But damn it, this is my little brother-"
[Geese:] "Your little brother stood toe to toe with Bak Fu and could have won that match on his own. He has made it through the rigors of both the Valiant Wrestling Alliance and Pro Wrestling Wild. He has defeated Naja Mask and Centurion and has not backed down from any challenge. He is a man now, Holly. And while I think he's making the wrong choice tonight, it's HIS choice to make."
[Holly:] "You always have to be so damn reasonable."
[Kyle:] "So it's ok? I can do it?"
[Geese:] "We have another few matches before yours. I am going to run you through a sequence of exercises. If you can pass them to my satisfaction, I will allow you to compete."
*Holly breathes a sigh of relief but Kyle looks angry*
[Kyle:] "Hey! What happened to being a man now and being able to make my own decisions?"
[Geese:] "You're making those decisions in my promotion and my interests are involved. I have decisions to make that outrank yours. If you can survive a warm-up session with me, then I'll let you go out there."
[Kyle:] "Fine."
[Geese:] "Agent 0, make sure Dramesi is long gone and that MAXIMUM security is utilized for the main event if Kyle can compete."
[Agent 0:] "Yes sir."
[Geese:] "Drake, it appears we have time to do what we discussed earlier. Just make sure "he" is protected sufficiently before it takes place."
[Drake:] "Yes, sir. And Kyle...I think I misjudged your character. You do belong in UBL afterall."
*Drake goes over to shake Kyle's hand and Kyle nods back to him. We go back to John in the arena.*
[John:] "Wow, I can't believe Kyle wants to go through with his match. But we still have a while to go to see if Orochi Geese deems him able to wrestle. So for now, let's get to our next Nexus Title Tournament match - D.F. Allen of BINGO-1 vs. Johnny Brooke! Johnny entered this tournament after coming off a HUGE victory against Gene Starr earlier this year. And he has had no problem advancing in this tournament, his mindset is confident and clear. That is in stark contrast to the pain and confusion D.F. Allen must be feeling after personally witnessing what happened to his teammate Johnny BINGO at the Lunar Battalion show. We still have no answers as to the location or health of Johnny and D.F. has been taking it pretty hard. Many Buffalo-based fans of BINGO-1 have come down today to support D.F. but no one knows what kind of mental or physical condition he'll be in tonight. We're about to find out."
*Johnny comes to the ring to a chorus of boos as he wears a "Brooke Broke Ya" shirt" and a smirk. And when DF Allen comes out, the fans erupt in applause.*
[John:] "The fans are fully supporting D.F. here and for good reason."
*DF nods to them but looks conflicted...that is until Brooke rips up a "Johnny BINGO" poster at ringside. DF Allen charges to ringside with a fury in his eyes not seen before!*
[John:] "Wow, what was Johnny thinking THERE? We're about to have a brawl!"
Match #5: DF Allen vs. Johnny Brooke
Nexus Championship Tournament Round 2
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[John:] "There's no doubt that DF was enraged during this match due to "Brooke's breaking" of the Bingo sign. And while that intensity worked early to give DF control and bust Johnny open, I think it served to distract and fatigue DF later on, allowing Johnny easy access to weaken his limbs. By the end, DF was limping due to continuing to use his flying knee despite the work that Johnny had done on it. And so Johnny just had to grab DF in a rolling heel hook to put him away and secure the victory."
DF Allen (X) [Rolling Heel Hook - 17:27] (O) Johnny Brooke
*Johnny Brooke leaves while celebrating. DF remains in the ring.*
[John:] "DF Looks very despondent here and...wait, what's this?"
*VD Dod and Fat Lip of LRI come out to ringside and are laughing at DF Allen from the ramp*
[John:] "Oh this is just too much! The same wrestlers responsible for launching BINGO into outer space are now mocking DF for his hard fought loss. DF is just too tired and hurt to even attempt to attack them...but it appears that feeling isn't mutual!! They're about to run to the-
"Not so fast" - bellows out from the curtains as Drake Yoshida walks out with a microphone.
[Drake:] "I've had enough of LRI causing chaos around here and so has Geese. You see, it turns out that we invited you two here for a reason tonight. We wanted you and everyone here to know that the BINGO-1 team is going to have to drop out of the Battalion because they are a member short."
*The crowd boos and LRI continues laughing.*
[Drake:] "At least...that is what WOULD have happened had Johnny gotten injured in an actual match. But you went to despicable lengths to get rid of Bingo. And by "despicable," I mean methods that got Geese fined by thw US government for allowing a wrestler to get lost in space."
*LRI proceed to laugh at this.*
[Drake:] "I'm a lenient guy, so is Geese. But the second ANY of you on this roster do something that negatively affects him, that's the second you're on his list for revenge. And so we have decided to give BINGO-1 some assistance in this Battalion by bending the rules. The Destroyer has gone to look for Johnny Bingo and so that leaves the entire BINGO-1 Battalion as just DF Allen. But one thing the Destroyer did before he left was confer with DF over which two men they thought Johnny would pick to back them up."
*Two huge men walk out from the curtain from behind Drake and advance towards LRI.*
[Drake:] "Let me introduce you all to TAX and Tommy Bongo, the newest additions to the BINGO-1 Battalion. And I think you two are going to enjoy meeting them...in fact, let's have a match RIGHT NOW."
*The fans are cheering wildly, especially those with BINGO-1 shirts on. TAX and Tommy chase LRI into the ring and begin brawling with them, sending them outside with a double clothesline. VD and Fat Lip look at each other in a panic and begin to run into the crowd.*
[Drake:] "Eh eh. And if you two refuse to face them, LRI will be thrown out of the Battalion!"
*The fans cheer again and Coach McGuirk runs down to the ring as a ref. DF Allen is helped backstage by medics as Drake walks backstage as well to a surprising amount of cheers. LRI gets back into the ring.*
[John:] "Hey don't look at me fans, we got an additional match! And call me crazy or naive, but somehow i don't see Drake ending THIS impromptu match early!"
Match #6: Tornado Tag: BINGO-1 vs. LRI
Tommy Bongo/TAX vs. VD Dod/Fat Lip
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[John:] "It's hard to say this was adequate revenge for what LRI did to Johnny Bingo but it sure was a start. The two new members of the BINGO-1 Battalion punished LRI here and didn't appear content to just end the match until they were sufficiently convinced LRI was beaten up. That did give LRI a number of chances to turn the tide but I think it was pretty clear who had the upper hand in this match. My only question is where was the LRI ring leader, Stuart Robinson, during all of this?"
TAX/Tommy Bongo (O) [Backdrop Hold - 21:30] (X) VD Dod/Fat Lip
*Both teams leave without further incident...on account of Genji Security escorting them*
[John:] "It's time for our next match. Hank Panky has been given just three more chances to win a match in UBL or else he will not be given a contract. Alternatively, Drake Yoshida was very impressed with Park Hyun Soo who had a great match at the previous show against Gene Starr but fell just short. Park would like to get some momentum going while Hank...well, he just want to stay around. Will he do so or will the "Burning Kid" take his next step towards blazing a successful career here?
Match #7 - Hank Panky vs. Park Hyun-Soo
Hank Panky Trial Series
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[John:] "Ahh, you hate to see that. But some people...they just...i guess they just can't bend in certain directions. Hank got injured during one of Park's lightning fast attempts at a small package and was unable to escape the pinfall. It looks like it may just be a freak injury, and hopefully not a long term one. But Park certainly was controlling this match well up until that point and dominated Hank."
Hank Panky (X) [Small Package KO (!?) - 7:23] (O) Park Hyun-Soo
[John:] "And the medics have come out...for the third time tonight...to take Hank Panky away. Meanwhile Park celebrates with the fans. Folks, I think we're about ready for our main-"
*Seven Nation Army by the White Stripes hits, the crowd boos and out comes out an arrogant, frosted haired competitor known as Daddy PrimeTime. He approaches the ring and takes his sweet time to enter. DPT grabs the mike and addresses the UBL crowd.*
[DPT:] I know, your booing because I don't have a match tonight, I must say I am also disappointed that I'm not competing, but fear not I have come out to make your night better. First, for the few of you who don't know me, my name is Daddy Primetime, not Daddy Daytime Soap, or Daddy Evening News, its Daddy Fuckin' Primetime. Now with that out of the way I have to say I am unimpressed with the UBL. I've looked over the roster and I see bland wrestler after bland wrestler. Hell you dumbasses are evening willing to watch a chump like Julian Caesaro wrestle. But I am here tonight to announce my intention of destroying every wrestler in the ubl, and it starts with the Dambman...or Damb-I'm-Lame-man. I look at you and your stable of weak ass punks and think to myself its time to clean up the Damb-trash. While I was reviewing your bio it seems Damb you used to be a fan, well it looks like you should have remained a fan. Damb it might not be tonight, it might not be tomorrow, but I am making destroying your career my number one priority.
*The crowd continues to boo DPT*
[DPT:] Ya see damb, they are booing you. They think your lame. They are saying "DPT will you please take out the trash," and my only response to that is yes, I will. In closing all I have to say to you Lamb-man is watch your back, because I will kick your head off.
*As DPT finishes up his sentence, the Bure chant hits. Instead of going into Damb's FPCPP theme, "Rap Is The Language Of A Man's Soul" hits the speakers. As the J-Rapper implores the fans to ROW ROW FIGHT DA POWA Damb comes out in civilian attire, wearing jeans and his NS-D jersey. The crowd gives him a respectable pop.*
[Damb:] It's so good of Drake Yoshida to give the handicapped opportunities in the UBL. Long time no see DPT, all those smack hits must have rendered you deaf and dumb. I've got a burning question that I think the fans would like an answer to. How do you keep your hair like that? KMD thinks...(crowd pops) KMD thinks that it's premature aging, while Jae (crowd pops) thinks it's kept up by spunk. Y'know, from all the verbal masturbation you do. Me, I think it's just one of many, many bad decisions made regarding your life; like when your mother decided to let all those guys run train on her without protection nine months before you were born.
*The crowd chuckles uncomfortably at that one.*
[Damb:] On a more serious note, why is it that I get all of the delusional heels with lame comebacks? It's like a curse, first that UIG goober and now you. I mean shit, Lamb-man? Are you insinuating I'm a furry or something? That doesn't even make sense. Really now, Dick Piercing Trick, coming up with insulting names isn't that hard. Douche Pussy Troglodyte, Dookie Play Tranny, Dates Paraplegic Toddlers, etc, etc. I could spend the rest of the promo insulting you, but it gets boring after a while. Lemme just say this, you step to me or the NS-D again, and I'll be stealing your "head kicking " gimmick with extreme prejudice.
*Damb fakes a knee to DPT's face but falls just short, instead getting up close and personal with him. DPT is seething while Damb smiles that trademark smile. He says something inaudible to DPT, then leaves the ring to soak in the adulation of a new crowd.*
[John:] "Wow...it looks like another two recently debuting wrestlers have stormed onto the scene here and aren't so great at making friends. Dambman was backstage celebrating with his NiSan-Dan after their victory before but DPT wasn't too impressed with Damb's past efforts. It looks like these two are going to have quite the match at our next show. But for now, it's time for the main event!"
*Gene Starr comes down to ringside, more cocky then usual. He yawns a few times and does some very exaggerated morning stretching.*
[John:] "Either Gene doesn't think Kyle is gonna wrestle or he isn't worried one bit if he does."
*After a few second delay, "Kick 'em when he's down" goes onto the speakers.*
[John:] "That's typically the theme song of OG-Joshi World Champion Holly but it seems she is 'lending it' to her brother tonight in a show of support. And here he is! Bandaged head to toe but standing and even jogging on his own power! Kyle Walker is truly a marvel to behold!"
*The applause is deafening as Kyle jogs down to the ring with a confident but serious look. Gene shakes his head in mock disbelief and dismissiveness.*
[John:] "Even on a healthy day, this would be a tall order for Kyle. Gene has more experience, more strength, better striking, and superior submission abilities. He's the current M-DWF Champion as well as a previous holder of many titles. Kyle, for his part, was one of the holders of the prestigious VWA 6 Man Championships and his definitive in-ring advantages over Gene are speed and agility. But most of all, as much of a cliche as this is, Kyle Walker has more heart then many people can even dream of having. And as strong as the will and fighting spirit of Gene Starr are, he may actually be underestimating the heart and energy of Kyle Walker here, which is a crucial mistake for anyone to make."
*Kyle manages to have enough power to vault over the ropes which causes Gene's expression to turn a bit more serious.*
[John:] "And we are ready for our main event! This will be the final Round 2 matchup of the Nexus Title Tournament. Whomever wins this match will face Jang Bae in the next round! Let's get to it!"
Match #8: Kyle Walker vs. Gene Starr
Nexus Championship Tournament Round 2
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[John:] "What can you say about Kyle Walker there? He gave his all but fell short to Gene's submission expertise. He just couldn't fight out of Gene's Starr Shooter and appeared to even pass out in the hold before the ref helped him regain consiousness. Kyle refused to tap out despite the pain of the match and everything that happened with Nicole. But Gene, to his credit, did not hold back and respected Kyle's abilities and that allowed him to do what he had to do to win the match. Gene looked very polished and confident and I think it's going to take a huge effort on the part of Jang Bae to defeat him."
Kyle Walker (X) [Starr Shooter - 16:44] (O) Gene Starr
*OrochiGeese and Holly run out to the ring as Gene Starr bails out. Geese and Holly help Kyle out of the ring. The medics come but he refuses them and he walks backstage on his own power as Holly and Geese follow him. When Kyle gets to the ramp he turns around and thanks the fans. Holly hugs him and raises his hand up. Meanwhile, Gene gets back into the ring and gives his own special show of respect by declaring Orochi Army is "Number 1". Geese smirks and looks like he's about to walk to the ring but Holly stops him and the three go backstage without further incident. Holly has tears in her eyes but this time, of pride.*
[John:] "Wow, Gene almost got an scheduled 1 on 1 meeting with the boss there but I think Holly had just enough chaos for the night. And what a night it was as Mr. Starr has advanced to the next round of the Nexus Title tournament along with Jang Bae, Johnny Brooke, and Juan Leche. UBL will come at you next with the fifth week of Battalion action emanating from Buffalo, New York. See you then, fans!"
*Fin*